Monday, December 13, 2010

Abundance Part 3

So, the new level of understand about living in the moment and how that relates to abundance began and it was not until later did I realize how this new perspective was about to change my life for ever. You see, it is not enough to simply know these thing. Spirit has a tendency to help you create situations in your life that allows you to experience, first hand, these new perspectives.

Soon after that fitful day, every thing in my life began to shift. What I had thought was a slow down in finances was a walk in the park compared to what I began to experience. It seemed that every thing I owned began to fall apart. These things I speak of where things that are necessary for living such as my car, my computer, my refrigerator etc. Big ticket items.

All of these began to fail, one by one. Some quickly and some began the slow death process. To my utter disbelief I did not panic. Instead I choose to breath, (a lot) and to have that proverbial "faith the size of a mustard seed".

Information became the most important element in the moment. "How much will it cost to fix the car, the frig"? The computer was not a concern at the moment, I could live without that. 

I began to shift my focus to the things I could do now, since to think about all of it was overwhelming and panic would rise to cut off my air supply. I became tunnel visioned and all the rest fell into a temporary shadow waiting its turn for resolution. If I could not find the money or the answer that day, I would release the whole thing just like I would if I mailed a letter by placing it in a mailbox.

 One by one, day by day, I did this. As I focused entirely on what was directly in front of me to deal with vs every thing that needed attention, I began to relax and breathing began to get easier.

At the end of each day, I fell into bed in gratitude that the day was over and I was still able to breath. It didn't matter if the little money I had was slowly dwindling away, the day was over and blessed relief in sleep was close at hand. I remember that before I allowed myself to sleep, I worked hard at finding the one thing that day to be grateful for. Like eating for instance. *smile*
Trust me, it was no picnic to feel my insides up around my throat day in and day out as I walked through each day, slowly, one breath at a time. Nor was waking in the middle of the night in a cold sweat with nightmarish images dancing in my head, fun. I truly felt alone and desitute.

Now, I would love to tell you that all of this had a happy ending. And it did, but I wasn't finished with what I had set up for myself as a huge learning curve. That is what is important here because this experience was so life changing that even when I had nothing and I mean nothing, I witnessed a truly miraculous thing. I actually witnessed the universe BEND in order to show me just how much are faith and trust can create miracles. Stay tuned.

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